Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
Randomize
