i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
Why did my mother make you get naked?
Randomize
