she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
I faked an abortion last night.
Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
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