after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
I DEMAND FORESKIN
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
