fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
Randomize
