Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
Randomize
