I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
Randomize
