I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
Randomize