hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Randomize
