Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
Randomize
