saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
