you would pick up someone in the library
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize
