did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize
