I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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