I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
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