I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
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