No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
