Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Randomize
