bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Randomize