How'd it feel making her break her religion?
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
Randomize
