either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
you're hired as official boob wrangler
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
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