Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
