apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
So many bounce houses so little time
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
Randomize
