people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
I love you.
Bad choice
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize