You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
Randomize
