dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Randomize
