I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Randomize
