I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
Randomize
