I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
