the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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