I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
Randomize
