Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Randomize
