Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Randomize
