it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Randomize
