I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
Randomize
