Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
Randomize
