2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Randomize
