dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
Randomize
