we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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