just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
Randomize
