Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
Randomize
