....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
Randomize
