You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Randomize
