susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
Oh god it's open bar.
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