Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize