I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Randomize
