she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
Randomize
