Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
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