Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
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