God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
