she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
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